I dont get it

I don't get it at all. Why are can things turn in to secconds from fine to not fine? How do they get all mixed up? Why do they break? why can't I find the missing piece?
There are alot of things at stake right now, and I'm making it a bigger deal than it should be. My eyes are blood shot right now, and they are filled with tears and the computer screen looks a little blurry. I'm jsut scared. It's not even somthing important, but it's somthing I've never done with out. I feel like I'm drowning. I'm trying to swim back to the surface, but the harder I kick, the more tired I get and the deeper I sink.
I feel like a jerk. There are people killing themselves to reach me in the water, but there arm is still just beyond there fingertips, leaving them feeling like they are not doing doing there job, when really it's me who is the problem. I don't know how to fix this. My head is pounding and my face is wet from tears. I'm trying my hardest, but it seems its not good enough, but crying wont help me, sitting here at my computer wont help me. I need to do somthing, somthing that i missed. Here i go- and i dont know where.

Quitting

So people always say don't quit. But I'm starting to wonder if people give people a reason to quit. Like I'm not suggesting it what so ever...but i am just saying I can see why people sometimes want to give up.It's hard, fixing thigs that are broken takes time, effort,vulnerablity, sometimes exceptance of defeat and the courage to get up even though all odds say your gonna fail. Willingness to feal pain, bumps and bruises, cuts and scratches. So with all this at risk, people make you want to quit. It's safer, easier and logicly makes much more sence. You see when circomstance hits you, it's diffrent.Circomstance is somewhat predictable, you can kinda see what you're next step is into getting better.You are alive and it is not.IT can only come in so many ways. Eventually storms blow over, eventually rain will stop eventually you can walk. People how ever, are entirely diffrent. People are alive, unpredictable, determined, complex.........wait, so this sometimes makes things harder but imagine for a minuite. If we watched Shreck right now and all Shreck had to do to save the princess was ring the door bell...umm good job? The part that makes it nobel and worth achnolegement it the fact that he went through so much to get her. Slaying dragons, crossing lava...etc. Why? Because it was worth fighting for! Yeah he got burned,he fell he got cuts and scratches...but he got the princess! So is somthing more meaningfull if you work to get it? yup! Quiting makes to much sense. its safer logical and easy.But reach beyond what you can see reach beyond what makes sence reach in hope, reach unafraid of the ground reach in determination cuz maybe just maybe if you reach far enough, you jsut might get somthing and its better to try and fall that then to sink in the mud.