peaceful moments

so i have been studying super crazy and have been stressing myself out and today i relaized i am actually prepaired and know my stuff so breathing has finially become an option - i am way less stress and it is wonderful.
I have had a relitivly happy evening- and i am realizing stuff.
So much has changed sence I've moved here. I remember coming here for the 1st time, going down my dirt road on the prairies 100% convinced that the world was going to end and that like would not get any worse- to the point of now where I am sad in a way to leave for summer and am very glad i moved here.
Life is funny and i've decided that i'm not meant to understand it- jsut live it. And I refuse to waste my time worrying about things that aren't going to matter in a year. And i refuse to waste my time trying to understand what the heck I'm doing. IF i knew what was gonna happen - why would I need faith?
I was listening to the song Gratitude -and it brought me straight back to camp Wabana- and is a huge chuck of what brought me to be me to where I am today.
And listening to the song helped me remember that each exprerence I go through helps me become who i am - even the ones that I dont like. this blog is really random and its all the smush left in my brain behind french, history and math. But i guess my real conclusion is that the year is done now- and this year has been a huge learning expereice for me- somthing i thaught would be terrible ( moving) became wonderful, and i am happy i came here. I will enjoy every step of life and concentrate on the present making sure i dont miss a beat.
that blog probely made no sence bnut i ahve an excuse - i study to mcuh and am thinking weirdly still

stupidity irritates me

stupidity irritate me- not stupid people so much - but smart people who act stupid.It makes sense in my head but maybe i'm comming accross stupid- whatever. Anywho i hate when like smart people who know better say somthing completly inaproiate and stupid. They know what there saying is competly obserd yet for some reason they need to let the load of garbage come out of their mouth. The point of this? i have no idea. Seriously some people really must have nothing better to do with their time - they know what their saying is dumb so why waste your breath? Jeez
sorry...slightly fusturated

JEEEEEEEEEZ

Holy cow i think my head is going to pop of my body. I seriously have so much on the go right now its not even funny. Mom is gone away so i am trying to help my brother with exam stuff plus I am doing extra stuff like cooking and what not. On top of all this i have a crazy amount of projects and i myslef really need to study for exams. I always get stressed at exams anyway so this is just adding to it.My life has become revoled around to do lists. If its not on the list i dont know what I'm doing. Right now everything is running ahead and i'm afraid i can't keep up.I know I said that i need to learn to take baby steps but i am worried if I stop running, I will fall behind. So yeah thats wahts on the go right now. I need to catch my breath at some point the question is when do I have time.

Hold on

It will find you at the bottom of a bottle
It will find you at the needle's end
It will find you when you beg and steal and borrow
It will follow you into a stranger's bed

It will find you when they serve you with the papers
It will find you when the locks have changed again
It will find you when you've called in all your favors
It will meet you at the bridge's highest ledge

So baby don't look down- it's a long way
The sun will come around to a new day

So hold on
Love will find you
Hold on
He's right behind you now
Just turn around
And love will find you

It will find you when the doctor's head is shaking
It will find you in a boardroom mostly dead
It will crawl into the foxhole where you're praying
It will curl up in your halfway empty bed

So baby don't believe that it's over
Maybe you can't see 'round the corner

To hang between two thieves in the darkness
Love must believe you are worth it
You're worth it